It is now time to end the lamentable spring of unfaithfulness dominating this country and convince the cheating animals inside of us to stop going inside other animals. Let the liturgical and plenary revolution save men's lives from being turned into mulch by their savaging females.
Tips to be faithful to your "pocket boobs" (lame poker expression):
- In the absence of the female, recur to masturbating options. Excess semen leads to excess stupidity and suicidal moves. A gorgeous Corvette is worth nothing if there is no fuel - although it is pretty nice to look at.
- If possible, make sure your girl is German. If she is, trust me, there is no need to even take a glimpse at this article.
- If a girl seems to be tempting, just imagine her fart in a trumpet like fashion. Perhaps a slight liquidly sound would help as well.
- Play Pac Man. Not Mrs. Pac Man.
- Actually, for precaution, play with yourself before playing Pac Man.
- Do not have attractive female friends. Period. Go to an attractive female friend and say : "I am sorry but we cannot be friends anymore because you are hot."
- Move to the East Coast. The water is colder there. (Besides, Hooters in Massachusetts is not exactly Hooters in California, so you are out of danger) unless you like girls who are so fat the mount everest tries to climb them.
- Check this link and imagine these things while under temptation:
http://www.alternativereel.com/includes/top-ten/display_review.php?id=00071
- Specially the second one in that web site...
